Live Big

Living big is the essence of my life. Since birth, I have been the type to live big. One of those kids that every parent loves until they become an unharnessed and confused teenager. The person that doesn’t shy away from a challenge, is always trying to soak up every second of an experience, and to my mother’s dismay lacking a fear of much of anything. Big living individuals love life, experiences, and people. Contrary to what some believe, living big is not throwing all caution to the wind and trying to appease your every whim at a given moment. Living big means you are living in the moment rather than escaping it and staying true to you. True to the principles and intentions that drive you. True to the things that make you who you are. To truly live big you have to live life on life’s terms and learn to find the good.

Sounds easy enough, right? It also sounds appealing enough. Honestly, who doesn’t want to enjoy life? I have seen some miserable people, but not a one of them has wanted to feel misery. So, why are we all not trying to fully experience life? It’s because while life is beautiful, wonderful, thrilling and exciting; it’s also gross and miserable. Let’s be real, everyday cannot be rainbows and unicorns. That is simply not life. Some days you want to throw in the towel and give up. Some days you want to employ wreck less abandon to escape a situation, but you can’t. You just can’t. Life isn’t a relationship you can decide to walk away from because it’s becoming strained. It’s not a job you can leave because it takes too much from you. It’s not a neighborhood you move out of because the view no longer suits your taste. As long as you are a living, breathing human, life will be there. Full of all of it’s harsh lessons and realities. Each individual’s view of the irony, and sometimes cruelty of life, is what distinguishes a person that intends to live big from one that simply lives. It is a life purpose. A way YOU decide to live and think each and every day. I will be absolutely honest when I tell you that this won’t be done perfectly. We do, however, improve as we experience more of our journey.   The more we focus on the good and our passions, the more we will find them in life.

I’m writing this on the first day of a new year as I reflect back on the perplexity of life and another year. This is the truth, if you ask me about 2015 I will tell you that it’s a year I detest. If I could punch 2015 in the face I would….more than once. This year taught me more about myself than ever. This year I have experienced life on a deeper level. Looking back on it makes me anticipate times when I don’t have to dig through so much muck to find the good. While 2015 was clearly not my favorite; I want to say that I have had some of my best times in 2015 too. This year I took more trips, I watched my children experience life to the full, I laughed so hard my abs hurt for days, I enjoyed recreational activities with my friends and family, and this may come as a shocker to you all, had the best trip with my husband ALONE that we had our entire 16 years together. It’s true. He planned out every detail of a second honeymoon as a surprise. And when I say every detail, I mean down to childcare and everything. I just had to pack my bag and get in the truck at the departure time. If you know me, that in itself is a process. This was our anniversary trip in January and just days before he died in July he was telling a friend, “I loved that trip with Autumn. That was our best trip ever. I want to do that trip again everyday.” See, I can’t write 2015 off as all bad. I can say that it has been a year that I experienced life and loss on a profound level. It got real in 2015. In the realness I have discovered more of what fuels me, and my big living intentions. I fully comprehend how short and unpredictable life is. I know what I value and want to surround myself with. My friendships and family relationships are deeper and stronger. I’m better able to weed out the unimportant things and people from my life. Plus, we as a family are learning how resilient we really are. Through all of the sadness and pain I am thankful that my children are learning the value of life and to appreciate it at a young age. I can’t even image how much intentional, big living they will do after learning these lessons so young. This thought gives me goose bumps.

So here is my challenge for all of us. As you contemplate the happenings in 2015, look for the good. Look for the big laughs, the hard cries, and everything in between. Look for the lessons that you’ve learned and the discoveries you’ve made about yourself. And for crying out loud, apply what you’ve learned. Live in the moment and let the small stuff go. Tell the ones you love that you love them. Do at least one thing you’ve always wanted to do. Set goals. Surround yourself with people that you can laugh and cry with. Make the changes that need to be made and appreciate how far you’ve come. Fully experience your life because who knows what tomorrow or even the next minute will bring. Shine on you supernovas. Shine on. 2016….we got this!

This post is dedicated to my big living son and Uncle Rick.  Clearly they get living big.  “We could get nuked any day!”  “If I’m going to get nuked, I want to get nuked with you.”

Just a few of my big moments of 2015